Divorced at 30 was not a blog I ever wanted to be the author of – but I am. So…… how does someone who is divorced become the voice of experience in keeping your Relationship together?
Ohhh it's rough but a common occurrence in relationships. Why? Because for some of us when we get hurt, we shut down, the walls go up and nothing is going in or out. It’s more of a protection mechanism than a malicious behavior, although that’s very hard...
There are times in our Relationships when we hurt each other, we are all human and this happens to all of us. Please know I am not referring to massive hurts like infidelity (this is a much bigger topic and outside the realm of this blog).
I am talking about the hurts when things are said or done that perhaps weren’t meant, weren’t thought through enough or through your partners lack of insight, judgment or consideration you were hurt.
I had a brave mumma send me through a question yesterday which she was hoping I could answer for her.
She is 30 years old married and has a 6 month old baby, she has noticed a decreased in affection, sex and intimacy with her husband since the bubba has come along. She has put on some weight post baby and is missing the affection from hubby – she wants to know what I would advise.
A few nights ago on The seven year switch we saw Michelle talking about losing herself. She says she ‘use to be fun, spirited and light hearted and she wasn’t those things anymore’ and declared to her husband she never would be her old self again.
Maybe this is the lesson we need to learn, so that when we come out the other side of parenting small people, we have a new thirst for life, and an appreciation for time and for following our dreams and creating a life we love.
Often couples think if they just keep the peace, don’t express their opinion, keep quiet, don’t cause an argument then this is better for their relationship and I can whole heartedly tell you 90% of the time it is not.
Your friendship however is like the foundation of a house, and your family and life that you’ve built together is the house. If the foundation gets a crack in it, or even a few over time, what’s going to happen? That’s right, the house is in jeopardy, and it may even fall down. This is exactly what happens in relationships when we don’t invest enough time and effort into them. If we don’t look after the most CRUCIAL ingredient in keeping your family happy, strong and together, (the FRIENDSHIP) the cracks start to appear.